Ultimate Guide to Hatewatching Matchday 12 for FCD Fans

ville-Charlotte, there’s no question. The best choice here is the U-vs.-Crew match.

I’ve got to give the 2023 and 2024 MLS Cup champions credit for at least starting the season with some gusto, going 5-0-1 in their opening six games, thanks in large part to the league’s top defense allowing only two goals so far. But on the other hand, we have the Gold Cup to thank for the Crew introducing the most tilt-a-whirl roster of the season as they sit in a three-way tie for fourth in the East on 10 points. The game features relegation-threatened Philly, who hasn’t won since the opening Dillon Stadium affair, against The Team That Hates So Much That We Won’t Speak Its Name.

So here are two teams that seemed ready to build on successful runs last season, but they’ve both kind of lurched into the last game of our lookaround with very real question marks surrounding them.

Jefe the Hater’s rooting pick: Could anyone actually think I’d pick The Team That Hates So Much That We Won’t Speak Its Name in this space?

Seriously, eff the Crew.

Supporters’ Shield Race Update

New York Red Bulls are beating everybody 1-0. Seattle is owning the chaff in the Western. And that’s it. That’s the list.

OK, just kidding. But with the international break, we’ve only got some of the teams in action for May, so a lot of this space is going to look like “New York Red Bulls continued their stingy defense” and “Seattle got its expected result.”

I mean, god forbid that we give any big ups to Orlando City for earning the early lead with wins in six of their eight May matches, or mention that only Seattle has scored more goals than them this season. Or that the lone team that has scored more goals than Seattle is New York Red Bulls, thanks in part to Thiago Motta deciding to put both Tyler Adams and Aaronson down the road like valuable human chess pieces.

I promise next week we’ll start actually talking about the same eight games all the time. Seriously.

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Dustin Christmann
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